Wales, where the men are men and the sheep are nervous...
Q: What do you call a sheep tied to a fence in Wales?
A: A leisure center.
Q. What do you call a Welshman with many girlfriends?
A. A Shepherd.
Q. Did you hear that Welsh people have discovered a new use for sheep?
Three men are sitting in the maternity ward. One is an Englishman, one a Welshman and the other a Jamaican. Suddenly the doctor comes and says,
“Gentlemen, your wives have all had little boys! However in the confusion we may have mixed the babies up. Could you come to the nursery to help us identify them?"
The Welshman ran to the nursery, picked up a dark-skinned baby with dreadlocks and said,
“This boy is mine.”
The surprised doctor said, “But this child looks Jamaican.”
“True,” said the Welshman “but there is a fifty fifty chance that one of the others is English, and I’m not taking the risk.”
What do you call a Welsh farmer with a sheep under one arm and a goat under the other?
How am i doing? Have i redeemed myself? (The Jo Brand comment ;0)
What's the most common lie a Welshman tells?
"I was only trying to help that sheep over the fence!"
Do you see a common theme emerging!?
Do Welsh men really like sheep?
On a tour of Wales, the Pope took a couple of days off his Itinerary to visit the West coast near Aberystwyth on an impromptu sightseeing trip.
His 4X4 Popemobile was driving along the golden sands when there was an enormous commotion heard just off the headland. They rushed to see what it was and upon approaching the scene the Pope noticed just outside the surf, a hapless man wearing an English Rugby jersey, struggling frantically to free himself from the jaws of a twenty foot shark.
At that moment a speedboat containing three men wearing Welsh Rugby Shirts roared into view from around the point. Spontaneously, one of the men took aim and fired a harpoon into the shark's ribs, immobilising it instantly. The other two reached out and pulled the Englishman from the water and then, using long clubs, beat the shark to death.
They bundled the bleeding, semi conscious man into the speed boat along with the dead shark and then prepared for a hasty retreat, when they heard frantic shouting from the shore. It was of course the Pope, and he summoned them to the beach.
Upon them reaching the shore the Pope went into raptures about the rescue and said, "I give you my blessing for your brave actions. I had heard that there were some racist xenophobic people trying to divide Wales and England, but now I have seen with my own eyes this is not true. I can see that your society is a truly enlightened example of racial harmony and could serve as a model on which other nations could follow.
"He blessed them all and drove off in a cloud of dust. As he departed, the harpoonist asked the others, "Who was that???!"
"That," one answered, "was his Holiness the Pope. He is in direct contact with God and has access to all God's wisdom."
"Well," the harpoonist replied, "he knows nowt about shark hunting.
How's that bait holding up or do we need to get another one?"